Who is looking after the mental health of business owners and managers?

Who is looking after the mental health of business owners and managers?

As the world prepares for a new normal, it’s fair to say that everyone has had many challenges thrown at them over the past three months. And while coping with change can be very difficult for a lot of people, we will in fact need to face more changes and more uncertainty in the months to come.

Will we return to normal, or a new normal? My wife once told me that the only “normal” there is, is the cycle on a washing machine!
And she is so right.

And while many people might be struggling on the inside, there’s the tendency to put on a “brave face” to the outside world – for our colleagues, our staff, our clients and our suppliers. And all of this tension can also lead to one feeling like an imposter – where we present a facsimile of a person that is coping, yet on the inside, the reality is very different.

There are many programs and initiatives for staff to help deal with fear, stress, anxiety, and depression; such as mindfulness, meditation, yoga, exercise, and many others.

But what about the business owners and the managers that in many cases, don’t get to avail of, or have time to benefit from these initiatives themselves – what happens for them? What can they do? And more so than staff, they have to maintain that “brave face”. After all, they need to show leadership. They can’t be seen to be weak.

And how is it that some business owners and managers thrive, even in a challenging economic market, while others struggle?

Well that’s been part of my study for over thirty years while working with high-level executives and business owners; and what has been incorporated into what I call The Executive Code, where the science and research forms the most comprehensive and practical methodology available.

So where does one start?

Well, we are all unique. There is no “normal”. And with us being unique we also have a unique set of what I call internal priorities.

Let’s go back to the Greek philosophers.

Aristotle referred to the fact that each individual has an inner desire to fill what is empty in their life. What is most void in our life. We seek to fill what is empty, i.e. we seek to fill these voids. Many of which were created in the formative years of our upbringing.

The voids which are most empty in our life, we will unconsciously want to fill the most. In other words, we unconsciously prioritise these voids. And we unconsciously seek out ways to fill these voids.

When we fill these voids or this inner emptiness in our life, then we are filled. We are full-filled. This is how personal fulfilment is achieved.

So in order to obtain maximum personal fulfilment, we must fill our voids in accordance with the voids that are of most priority.

And because we are unconsciously seeking out ways to fill these voids in line with what is of most priority, we therefore have what I refer to as a set of internal priorities.

It is also these internal priorities that our unconscious is actively getting the executive centre part of our brain to make manifest. The executive centre in our brain is located in the prefrontal cortex. It’s responsible for organisation, innovation, objectivity and execution of actions; in the fastest, easiest and less costly way. What I mean by less costly is in terms of all the resources that are needed – time, energy, effort.

It is our internal priorities that activates most effectively the executive centre part of our brain. And while our conscious mind processes 50 bits of information per second, our unconscious mind processes 11 million bits of information per second.

Therefore when it comes to wanting to operate at your full potential, achieving maximum fulfilment, being more innovative, objective and organised, and achieving your goals in the fastest, easiest and less costly way possible – then it makes sense to be operating from the executive centre part of your brain and developing your connection with your unconscious. And it is even more important to be doing so when faced with challenges to our business or our livelihoods such as in a pandemic situation or a recession.

Yet in my experience, of all the individuals, executives and business owners that I’ve worked with and observed, over 90% of them don’t operate in line with their internal priorities and their executive centre. And this is the main reason they struggle, while others thrive.

For many people that are not operating from their personal internal priorities, it can lead to them feeling a lack of fulfilment or meaning in their life. Or a sense that they’ve lost their mojo. That they can’t find their purpose or focus in life.

The reason being is that your unconscious is trying to fill these voids, and if the person is not working in line with their personal internal priorities, then these voids are not being filled.

Your internal priorities also form your unconscious blueprint when it comes to your relationships, your finances, your business, your health – everything in your life. It is these internal priorities that leads us to discover your true purpose and mission in life.

So when we consciously know our internal priorities, and we mould our business or our career around our internal priorities, two main things are happening.

We are filling our personal voids the most, and therefore we are achieving maximum person fulfilment.

And secondly, we are utilising our executive centre the most and beginning to open the connection to our unconscious, and in turn to the superconscious. And with this alignment, it enables us to achieve our vision, our goals and our objectives in the fastest, easiest and less costly way.

When this is done, the results that clients get are amazing. And apart from the personal fulfilment that they get, life becomes easier for them.

So if our internal priorities are operating from an unconscious level, how do we become aware of them so that we can build our business or career around them?

Well, we look for the evidence in our lives.

Through a series of specific questions and by drilling down on the answers, we’re able to find the evidence that is in our life of what our unconscious is trying to fill the most in our lives, both externally and internally.

Externally in terms of our environment, how we spend our time, how we spend our money, how we use our energy, and how we communicate with others.

And also internally. Our thoughts, our dreams and aspirations, our internal energy and also our internal communication – that little voice inside our heads.

When you know your own unique set of internal priorities, and you build your business, your career, your life around them, then that’s when you’re more motivated, more driven to achieve, more inspired to take action. That’s when you get maximum fulfilment in your life and you are expressing your true authentic self. You are bringing yourself, your executive centre, your unconscious and the superconscious more into alignment. You’re more creative, more innovative, and more objective. It’s your true authentic inner leader.

Then when it comes to challenges that show up in your life like recessions, pandemics, redundancies, health issues, financial loss – whatever it is, when you’re operating in this way, then what you see are opportunities while others see failures. And while others see challenges, you see springboards to higher levels.

It’s what makes the difference between the person that struggles, versus the person that is thriving. That’s the best way owners and managers can look after their wellbeing.

Your Authentic Self

Your Authentic Self

How do we become our authentic self, and what is it that gets us operating from the executive centre part of the brain more consistently and more sustainably?

And what is it that helps bring our life pendulum into equilibrium more easily?

Well, let’s go back to the Greek philosophers.

Aristotle referred to the fact that each individual has an inner desire to fill what is empty in their life. What is most void in our life.

We seek to fill what is empty. We seek to fill our voids.

The voids which are most empty in our life, we will want to fill the most. In other words, we prioritise the voids we want to fill the most.

And we unconsciously seek out ways to fill these voids. Ways to fill this inner emptiness in our life.

When we fill these voids, or this inner emptiness in our life, then we are filled. We are fulfilled. This is where personal fulfilment derivers from.

So in order to obtain maximum personal fulfilment, we must fill our voids in accordance with the voids that are of most priority.

And because we are unconsciously seeking out ways to fill these voids in line with what is unconsciously of most priority, we therefore, have what I refer to as a set of unconscious internal priorities.

It is our highest unconscious internal priorities that we are seeking to full-fill the most. It is by filling these internal priorities the most, that we achieve the most personal fulfilment, and we become our authentic self.

It is these unconscious internal priorities that our unconscious is actively getting our executive centre of our brain to make manifest.

Our internal priorities are what activates most effectively the executive centre part of our brain.

And when it comes to the executive code, it is this channel between the unconscious and the executive centre in the brain that we want to maximise the most, as I referred to in earlier blogs.

Because each person’s life is unique to them, they have a unique set of internal priorities.

Even if you have twins growing up in the same home, experiencing the same life, they each will have a unique set of internal priorities. The reason being is that each sibling will have their own perceptions of different events and moments in their lives.

So while two people can observe and be part of the same moment or event, each of them will have a different perception of that same moment or event.

So a person’s internal priorities are unique to them. They are fingerprint specific. It is their authentic self.

And for many people that are unaware of what their personal internal priorities are, it can lead to them feeling a lack of fulfilment or meaning in their life. Or a sense that they’ve lost their mojo. That they can’t find their purpose or focus in life.

The reason being is that your unconscious is trying to fill these voids, and if the person is not working in line with their personal internal priorities, then these voids are not being filled. Therefore there is no fulfilment.

Your internal priorities are also your unconscious view of the world – they’re how you perceive and judge others, what you pursue in life, and how you make decisions.

They form your unconscious blueprint!

You authentic self blueprint.

Your unconscious patterns when it comes to your relationships, your finances, your business, your health – everything in your life.

So when we consciously know our internal priorities, and we mould our business or our career around our internal priorities two main things are happening.

We are filling our personal voids the most, and therefore we are achieving maximum person fulfilment.

And secondly, we are utilising our executive centre the most.

And remember what I said in earlier blogs, our executive centre is what gives us our results in a faster, easier and less costly way.

As a result of operating from our executive centre, we are more creative, more innovative and more objective.

So if we want to achieve anything in life, and we want to achieve it in the fastest, easiest and less costly way – then it needs to be in line with our personal internal priorities.

If we do this while keeping our life pendulum that I spoke about in the previous blog in equilibrium, we are then also in sync between our executive centre, our unconscious and the SuperConscious. This is where true alchemy lies. This is where true mastery lies.

Also when we are aligned with our internal priorities, we are aligned with our true selves. The true essence of who we are. Our authentic self.

This is one of the main reasons why so many people suffer from imposter syndrome. Because they are doing a business or a career that is not fully aligned to who they truly are. Their authentic self. Their inner voice, their gut feeling, their intuition, knows it to be false, to be out of alignment, and therefore they feel inwardly that they are a fraud. With that inner feeling of being a fraud, they will never achieve the levels of success that they desire, because they don’t want to be found out. And if they don’t want to be found out – then they’re not going to push themselves out there more into the world for fear that they will be caught and found out.

When our life pendulum is in equilibrium, this is when we are most integrated with our true selves, our true nature, our authentic self. It is when we are integrated with our true selves that we are operating with integrity. For me, integrity means when we are fully integrated.

We become our true authentic selves. Again for me, that is when we are operating authentically and where our true authentic leadership shines through. We’re no longer a facsimile, and expression of someone else, or a learnt expression, or a shadow of someone else – we are our true selves because we are in line and in equilibrium with our own unique self. That which is fingerprint specific to ourselves.

When I work with clients – the first thing I do is identify their personal internal priorities. Then we look at building their business or career around their internal priorities. Then we set about bringing them into equilibrium with their true selves.

When this is done, the results that they get are amazing. And apart from the personal fulfilment that they get, life becomes easier for them.

And a common question I get from clients is, well if everyone has a set of internal priorities that is unique to them, and therefore their staff have a different set of priorities, how do they get their staff to operate from their own internal priorities so that they too achieve greater results in the business?

And it’s easy!

When we identify the internal priorities of each person in the business, and align how the purpose or mission of the business is serving each individual’s internal priorities, then that’s when you have full staff alignment and engagement with the mission and purpose of the business.

When we align each individual in the business, to how the internal priorities of their colleagues are serving them and each other, then you have maximum staff cohesion and engagement.

So if our personal internal priorities are operating from an unconscious level, how do we become aware of them and bring them into our conscious mind to that we can build our business or career around them?

Well, we look for the evidence in our lives.

Through a whole series of questions and by drilling down on the answers, we’re able to find the evidence that is in our life of what our unconscious is trying to fill the most.

By using a specific set of questions we’re able to find the evidence that is in our lives both externally and internally.

Externally in terms of our environment, how we spend our time, how we spend our money, how we spend our energy, and how we communicate with others.

And also internally. Our thoughts, our dreams and aspirations, our internal energy and also our internal communication – that little voice inside our heads.

When we know our own unique set of unconscious internal priorities, and we build our business, our career, our life around them, then that’s when we are more motivated, more driven to achieve, more inspired to take action. That’s when we get maximum fulfilment in our life and we are expressing our true authentic selves. We are bringing ourselves, our executive centre, our unconscious and the SuperConscious more into alignment. We’re more creative, more innovative, and more objective. It’s our true inner leader. It’s when we become our own unique pioneer.

When it comes to challenges that show up in peoples lives like recessions, pandemics, redundancies, health issues, financial loss – whatever it is, when you’re operating in line with the executive code, having your executive centre in line with your unconscious, and inline the SuperConscious, then what you see are opportunities while others see failures. And while others see challenges, you see springboards to higher levels.

It’s what makes the difference between the person that struggles, or is doing good enough, versus the person that is doing great or is thriving.

Without doubt, finding out what your own unique set of personal internal priorities is, is one of the most important exercises that anyone can do in their life.

There is more about this on my website which you’ll find in the details of this blog description.

And on the next blog, I’ll talk about finding your own unique purpose.

Until then, I wish you every success.

The Critical Line

The Critical Line

In my last blog, I mentioned that there is a critical line that shows up in our life between the states of Belief and Knowing.

It’s in the state of knowing that we need to learn how to straddle the old world and the new world. The old world of our state of belief. And the new world of our state of knowing.

The world that fed our ego.

Versus the inner calling to serve others and make a difference.

It can be a very unsettling time for many people, dealing with this critical line.

And as I mentioned in the previous blog, when we are in a state of knowing, we go on a quest for knowledge and wisdom. New deeper interests start to show up in the forms of spirituality, meditation, volunteering, intuition, social impact and the likes.

And many people seek out books, courses and activities that feed these interests. They even travel to different countries to hear from different gurus. Some spend months on mountains in deep inner reflection seeking answers.

But the difficulty is that many of these courses and activities are diverse. What I mean by that is that they’re not integrated. They cover one particular aspect of life or business, and they’re not joined up. They don’t get you past the critical line.

How do I know this…because I’ve done these same activities years ago.

And what I found is that they didn’t give me the answers I was seeking.

And what I found was that many of the gurus were living by themselves. They didn’t have spouses or partners. They didn’t have businesses to run or customers or clients to help and manage. Most of them spent a lot of their time in deep reflection and meditation. Others would refer to the fact that they spent their time on their own fluffy could.

It was like they didn’t have to deal with the day-to-day realities of life!

In fact, they purposely blocked out anything and anyone that knocked them off their Zen state.

So while they were exceptional in one aspect of their life. There were other areas of their life that were suffering, or what others might see as being imbalanced. While they might be high on the scale of say spirituality or finances, they were low on the scale when it came to say relationships.

Also, it appeared that there were elements of themselves that were being repressed in order for them to maintain in their Zen state.

And what you’ll find is that if an area of your life is repressed, it will be expressed in other ways – in order to bring you back into equilibrium.

Also if there is an area of your life that you are not empowered in, someone or something else with overpower you in that area.

So part of my research that I referred to in the earlier blogs was to find the way to get past the critical line and to thrive – to become that master – while also living in the real world!

And all of that research and methodologies, I’ve put into what I call the executive code.

As I said earlier, by doing a multitude of different courses or activities to find the answers – none of them are joined up.

And while you focus on fixing one part of your life, another part of your life ends up falling apart.

And while you’re repressing one aspect of your life, it is being expressed in another way that is being kept concealed.

So you continue in a vicious cycle of wavering between the state of belief and the state of knowing, and therefore not fully getting past the state of knowing to the state of mastery.

The cost is huge. Not just in terms of money and time. But also in terms of emotions, relationships and lost opportunities.

There remains this constant quest to find the answers. To find purpose. To find meaning and fulfilment.

Believe me, I’ve been there. So I know the full extent of how difficult it is to get past the critical line.

So while many people spend time in meditation, mindfulness, yoga or activities like these – it’s not getting them to the next level.

Don’t get me wrong – there is absolutely nothing wrong with any of these activities. In fact, the benefits of each of them are amazing.

The only thing is that everyone can’t be in a state of mindfulness or meditation, while also managing what can be a very stressful and busy business or career.

Do they help – absolutely.

Do they play a role in the executive code – yes.

What they help with is to quieten the mind in order to allow the inspired thoughts come up from the Unconscious.

What they help with is to bring the mind into equilibrium – to balance. I’ll talk more about this on a later blog.

Are there other benefits – yes – they help to calm you down and lower your stress levels.

But for many people their conscious mind and thoughts are very strong and therefore shortly after a person isn’t meditating, their conscious thoughts come back into play and bring up stress, fears, worry, anxiety, resentment, anger, hurt etc.

So the key is not to block out those conscious thoughts by just ignoring them or pushing them out of our mind.

When we do that – we’re repressing those thoughts. And remember what I said earlier – what you repress, will be expressed in some other way.

Many of the thoughts and feelings are there for a reason. They’re there as feedback to yourself that you’re not in equilibrium.

For most people, these thoughts that they keep repressed show up in illness – and nobody wants that.

So instead of pushing them out, ignoring them, or blocking them – what we need to do is dissolve them – neutralise them – bring them into balance.

And we do this by working with how the conscious mind works. It’s part of the work I do with clients.

If you keep blocking these thoughts out, you’ll continue to straddle between the state of belief and the state of knowing. You won’t get past the critical line to reach the levels of freedom that I spoke about before.

You can only get to the state of mastery by being in equilibrium in all aspects. Being in a state of equilibrium is the equivalent of love – pure love.

Pure love is seeing both sides – positive and negative – in total equilibrium.

If you’re biased towards one side, say negative, then you’re not truly in love. And if you are biased towards the other side, the positive side, then you’re still out of balance.

It’s when you see the positives and the negatives in equal measure, and loving both sides, that you get to be in a state of equilibrium, and therefore open the direct channels between the executive centre, the unconscious and the SuperConscious.

In an earlier blog, I outlined what the executive code is – it’s about operating from the executive centre of the brain – and all the things that are needed to do this – and then connecting with the unconscious – and then connecting with the SuperConscious.

The reason we want to be operating from the executive centre in the brain is because it’s responsible for finding the easiest, fastest and less costly way of achieving what we want to achieve. When I say less costly – I’m speaking in terms of all your resources.

Now if you can imagine in your mind’s eye – three circles. One below each other. So you have one circle at the top, another circle below it, and another circle below that. And in between each circle is a tube that connects the first circle to the second circle. And a tube that connects the second circle to the third circle.

Now let’s name the first circle – your executive centre. And we’ll name the second circle your unconscious, and the third circle the SuperConscious.

Your SuperConscious is what we call Universe, God, Source, Higher Power – or whatever name that you prefer to call the SuperConscious.

Now imagine there’s a vertical line going down through all the circles from the top circle through the tubes to the bottom circle. And at the end of this line is another smaller circle, so that it looks like a pendulum, – the kind you would see in a grandfather clock.

Now when that pendulum is vertical and straight – it is in equilibrium.

When it swings to either side – it’s not in equilibrium. And what you will notice is that if you swing the pendulum to one side, it is no longer going through the tubes between each circle, and it is no longer in the circle of the SuperConscious or perhaps even the unconscious, depending on how far the pendulum has swung. In other words, the connection between the executive centre, the unconscious and the SuperConscious is lost.

That’s how it works in real life.

What the executive code is all about is to help you bring everything into equilibrium so that you have that connection between your executive centre, your unconscious and the SuperConscious. In that way, you can bring about what it is you want to bring about in your life and live the highest truest expression of who you truly are. What you are meant to become.

That’s the amazing power of the executive code.

The downside of not living this way is that everything becomes harder. You don’t get to achieve what it is you want to achieve. More and more challenges show up in your life – the reason being is because nature is trying the whole time to bring you back into equilibrium. When you know how to do this, then you’re working with nature and not against it. You’re working in flow, not against flow.

The challenges that many people perceive in their lives – whether it be in their business, their career, their relationships, their health, their finances – no matter what aspect of their life that they look at – they then understand how to work with it. They no longer become challenges.

If you’re not working in line with the executive code, then you’ll constantly find yourself swinging between all the different states of being – from knowing, to belief, to hope, to despair, and perhaps back through to knowing again, and again, and again – constantly this up and down through the different states – like the signal on the heart rate monitor.

And more importantly, when you’re in a state of knowing, and you have that inner sense of being called towards something greater – in order to get there, and to bring that about – what you are meant to become – what you are meant to make manifest – your purpose – you have to move to the higher state.

And when it comes to your business, your relationships, your finances or your life – you want to be able to thrive. To have total freedom – in every aspect – to have real freedom.

That’s what you want to have. That’s what you want to achieve.

How do we get there?

Well, we need to start with our executive centre as I explained all along.

And while there are many things that you can do to assist with working from your executive centre – there is one that makes it more consistent, more sustainable and will bring that pendulum into equilibrium more easily.

What is it?

Well, that’s what I’ll cover on the next blog.

Until then, I wish you every success.

Take care and we’ll connect on the next blog.

How To Thrive In Life

How To Thrive In Life

When it comes to your business, your career or your sport, or any other interest that you might have, what does it mean to thrive in life?

Well, it could mean to grow, to develop, or to flourish.

But what if to thrive in life was to mean for you to reach your truest, highest potential – that is unique to you – so that you get the recognition and the reward that you desire – and ultimately get to make the impact you want to make,

or you get to make the difference you want to make – whether that be in your business, your career, your family, your community, your country or in the world?

And what if it was also to have freedom?

For many, when the word freedom is used, it conjures up financial freedom or personal freedom.

However, I view freedom as much more than that.

It’s complete freedom.

It’s being free to be the true essence of who you are. Without the limitations. Where we don’t have anything holding us back in terms of the negative thoughts, judgements, patterns or beliefs that keep us from achieving that which we innermost desire.

Where we get to achieve what we want to achieve. What we’re meant to achieve.

That for me is real freedom.

In my last blog post I talked about The Snakes and Ladders Life – about where we find ourselves sometimes moving three steps forward and two steps back.

Where throughout our life we encounter challenges while also achieving wins.

But I also mentioned that life is a game – and with it being a game – it’s supposed to be fun. In order to thrive in life it is to be fun.

So what if you had the rule book and the knowhow in order to not only win the game, but to excel at playing it – and that life then turns out to be fun and enjoyable.

Where you get to see the much bigger picture – as well as your part in that picture – your role – your purpose.

As well as knowing how to achieve it and fulfil it.

Well when I’m working with clients, that’s what The Executive Code does in order to help clients to thrive in life.

In this blog, I’ll be talking about the elements that you need – so as to know the rule book, as well as how to play the game of life – so that ultimately you get to reach your truest, and highest potential.

But why is it that people don’t reach their highest potential?

Well if you were to break the population down into 4 categories

What you will find in the first category are the people that struggle.

These are people that no matter how hard they work, and they generally work very hard, their business still struggles.

Generally what keeps them struggling is their fears.

Then the next category are the people that are doing just ok – this is where the majority of people are, and because they’re doing ok – they hit a glass ceiling – what I call the good enough ceiling.

This is the ceiling that what they’re achieving is good enough for them.

And what keeps them going is that when things start to drop from being good enough, to being ok, fear starts to kick in, and then they start working harder or doing something active in order to get back to being good enough.

And as soon as they reach their good enough ceiling – they relax and take the foot of the gas.

So they continuously go through this cycle of good enough to fear – to good enough to fear – to good enough…and so on.

And for the ones that want to get past the “good enough” ceiling, well they’re the ones that get to being great.

These people do a lot better than all the others – the strugglers and the ok people. They’re doing just great!

And then there’s the small percentage of the population that are thriving. They get to thrive in life.

It’s a really small percentage.

But why is that?

Well, take many of the clients I’ve worked with over the years as a business consultant and the thousands of people I’ve observed.

The vast majority of people have a vision of where they want to get to.

They have an image of what they want their life, their business, their career to look like.

And in order to achieve that vision – they invest in all the mechanics of getting their business, their career or their life right – the product or service they’re going to sell, the career path they’re going to take, the relationship, home and family they want to bring about.

And they also look at what they need to help them along the way – so they invest in people, sales & marketing, technology, university courses, for their business or career – or they’ll look for the house, or relationship that will make them fulfilled.

But then there’s the percentage of people that understand that they themselves need to improve – so they attend courses or get coaching on how to be a better business owner, manager, employee, or partner – and they believe that by improving themselves, they’ll succeed more, and be better for others.

On one of these blog posts I’ll talk about why that is such a bad idea. But for now, let me talk about the tiny percentage of people that thrive.

They’re the ones that realise that it’s not about changing others, and it’s not about changing themselves. In order for them to thrive in life they understand that it’s about changing how they view the world and how they interact in the world.

You see, Buddha talked about three different types of people and this forms part of what I’m talking about here – they’re the people that are asleep. Then there are the awakened. And then there are the enlightened. They’re the ones that know who they truly are.

But there are also the ones that not only know who they truly are – but live life from being who they truly are.

And that there is a very very tiny percentage of the world population.

Let me tell you what happens.

There are twelve “states of being” that people pass through. What I mean by a state of being is that it’s about how you view yourself.

It’s how you would describe yourself in terms of your mental state or how you perceive yourself in the world

For the purpose of this blog post, I’ll cover 5 of the twelve states.

There’s the state of despair – this is where you feel empty. That your life is meaningless and you wonder what the point of living is for. You have a sense that other people just “don’t get you”. You might even find yourself curled up on the couch crying, as well as literally crying out in despair for your situation. How it shows up is that you have a low mood or you have little energy for doing anything. You isolate yourself from others and sometimes contemplate ending your life. In fact, you’re just surviving. And for many people this is their life behind closed doors. Whereas to the outside world, they portray something completely different. They might portray the “everything is fine” persona – because as I said, others just don’t get them.

Then there’s the state of hope – it’s a good bit better than despair. This is where you’re looking towards the future. You’re planning ahead. You have desires or dreams to fulfil, but you also have fears that hold you back. But you’re not thinking about ending your life, your thinking about and hopeful for what your life could be like in the future. You have a sense of identity of who you are, and this might be expressed in terms of your business, your career, your job title or whatever is most important to you in your life. You have a focus and you’re interacting with other people. It doesn’t matter if you class yourself as extrovert or introvert – you’re still engaged with the world and not wanting to isolate yourself – unlike when you’re in despair. You’re hard-working as you’re hopeful about the future and want to achieve your goals as quickly as possible.

Then there’s the state of belief. Belief about yourself. You have a sense of how good you can be. Your ego is higher than in the other two states of despair and hope. You feel more confident. You feel you are becoming more successful. Your aim is to achieve as much as you possibly can. But it tends to be in terms of money, relationships, or status. In essence, there’s no real meaning to what you’re doing, you’re doing what you’re doing to get ahead, to get the money to pay the bills, to buy the things you want to buy, to have the holidays you want to have. You’re ambitious. You’re driven. You have loads of toys – the cars, the houses, the holidays, the meals out, the possessions – and you have the title.

And it’s at that state of being that the critical line is present.

It’s that critical line that is the threshold. The threshold that can prevent you from being able to thrive in life.

On one side you have the states of despair, hope and belief.

And then on the other side of the critical line are the states of knowing and mastery.

There are a number of things that can show up in our life that makes us aware of the critical line. It can be the sudden death of a loved one. The illness that alters our life. The financial loss from our business or redundancy. Or the separation or divorce.

It’s these moments of impact that get us to reflect inwardly.

For some people, they get over the speed-bump so to speak, and they go back to the way they were before, before the death of their loved one, the illness, the financial setback, the divorce – or whatever it was.

But for others, there is a slow awakening.

They have a desire for something better – to be greater – to thrive.

Or they have a sense that they should be doing something different. Like as if they’re being called to something greater. To make a difference. To make an impact. Not just in terms of the business or career that they have, but in terms of making other peoples lives better off.

It’s at that critical line that they move to the state of knowing.

They have an inner calling to change towards something greater. They have more compassion for others or for their environment. They get more inspired thoughts as they listen more to their intuition or unconscious mind. They seek out more and more knowledge. They attend more courses in the search for a deeper truth. As Buddha describes – they are becoming more awakened. They become more deeply spiritually aware and have a much deeper awareness of a Higher Power – God, Universe, Higher Mind, or Source. They become more about giving to others and serving others. It’s less about themselves and more about others. They understand deeply what is meant by emotional intelligence – because they feel it deeper inside themselves. They become more emotional themselves. They’re more inspired by the wonderment of nature, the universe, and the accomplishments of people. Some get involved in coaching others or volunteering as they see and feel the impact that it makes for themselves and for others.

But for many, they are still a split person. Inwardly, on one side, they’re trying desperately to hold onto the old world that they knew on the other side of the critical line. That critical threshold line. The world of what fed their ego. While on the other side they’re aching to follow what their inner self is calling them to. And this unsettling battle between the outer and the inner world can be very difficult for many people if they don’t know how to navigate it or they don’t have someone to guide them.

And then there’s the state of mastery. The ultimate way of living. The ultimate way of being. Because in this state you are on a mission. You’re driven – not like before. You’re driven to achieve your mission for the impact you know it will have on others. You feel abundant in all meanings of the word. There is no scarcity. You are in sheer awe and gratitude of how the universe works. You are completely in flow and have total freedom. The freedom that I spoke about earlier. You are free from everything. You have no attachment to anything. You are one. You are in oneness with everything and everyone. You know love in its pure sense. In its divine sense. In its unconditional sense. In its nonjudgemental sense – for everything and for everyone. You are a pioneer in your field. A leader. A maverick. You question the status quo as you know there is a better way. Your desire to make an impact is at it’s greatest. You want to bring about change. Bring about influence. And equally are well rewarded for it as you completely understand the law of compensation. You know how to flow and interact with the universe. You have become the true alchemist. That’s true mastery. You know, experience and work with the true inner power that you have inside. That amazing power that everyone has – but they just haven’t tapped into it.

That’s the state I want to bring you to through what I call The Executive Code. That’s the state that gets you to thrive in life.

To recap – the five states that I’ve outlined here, out of the twelve in total, are – despair, hope, belief, knowing and mastery.

For many people, they can spend days, weeks, months or even years in the same one state.

Whereas for others they might find themselves going up and down different states throughout the day, the week, the month or the year. A bit like the heartbeat monitor I spoke about in the last blog post.

Different things trigger them. And from that trigger, their state changes. It’s by identifying the triggers and then dissolving them, that we manage to maintain equilibrium and then move up to higher states quicker.

When you know and understand the different states of being, and you know the difference between each state – you realise what needs to be done to get to a higher state, and therefore ultimately to get to thrive in life.

So in order for you to get to thrive in life, it would be good for you to identify which state you would consider yourself as being in – and then from that, determine what you need to do to move to one of the higher states.

The Snakes And Ladders Life

The Snakes And Ladders Life

When I was a kid, I used to play a board game called Snakes And Ladders. You might remember it yourself. In America, it’s called Chutes And Ladders, but over here it’s called Snakes And Ladders. And the concept of the game was that it had 100 squares and each player picks a token to represent where they are on the board game. Then as each person takes their turn to roll the dice, they move forward on the squares from one to a hundred by the number of squares that matches the number that they rolled the dice on. Therefore, if a player rolls the dice and gets a three, then the player moves forward three squares and the winner of the game is the first player to reach the square 100. However, on the board game, there are snakes or chutes in America and if you land on a square that has the head of a snake, you have to slide down that snake on the board, to where the tail ends and therefore you go backwards in the game.

But then there’s also ladders on the board and when you land on a square that has the bottom of a ladder, you’re able to move up the ladder to a higher number, thereby getting closer to the square 100 and being the winner. Now, it is a great game, I really loved and enjoyed playing it and it can be really exciting when it’s played with multiple players. But you see, I use the analogy of Snakes And Ladders Life, like the board game, Snakes And Ladders, and I use that to represent how we go through life, much like the board game itself.

We are born, which can be represented by starting at square one. We’re given a body or a persona to live in, which is the token we use on the board game. We move forward year by year with the aim of getting to the ripe old age of a hundred or until we reach the success that we desire. And I know success means different things to different people, but ultimately that’s typically what we go through life as to do. Is to aim towards that either the ripe old age or to reach the level of success that we want to get to.

However, during our life, we encounter snakes. And these show up in the form of fears, addictions, depression or the events that knock us back like an illness, the death of a loved one or the breakdown of our marriage. Perhaps losing a job, losing our home or financial loss. But then there’s also the ladders that get us advancing in life such as the job promotion that we get, or our business begins to take off or we meet a new partner, we have to develop a relationship. We get a new client into our business, or perhaps when it comes to an illness, we get a clear diagnosis or even win the lottery if we’re so lucky to have such a thing or we just got a lucky break in life.

Some are big and some are small. And life is just full of these snakes and ladders for one better word. And like on the board game, in life not only does it feel we move forward and backwards, but there are also times we feel we’re literally going around in circles. We find ourselves in a pattern of taking three steps forward and then two steps back. It’s like a never-ending Ferris wheel and we’re just going around this Ferris wheel like on a treadmill and life for us, just seems to go round in circles.

But then there’re times where we get closer to our success, the level that we want and we’re just on the tip of it, and we can literally taste it. It’s actually so close and what happens is that more and more snakes start to appear. Everywhere we turn there is just a snake there ready to pull us back. And we’re on the brink of success and we’re nearly there, but we just get knocked back consistently. And some people give up in life and throw the board game off the table. Others keep going and get back on the board and get to the brink of success and in the hope that they will eventually get past all the snakes and reach that level of success that they so, so desire.

Life is like this. Life is like that Snakes And Ladders board game. But life is also like the infinity symbol that shows up as the constant ebb and flow. And the more we get into the ebb and flow of life, the easier it becomes to reach where we’re heading. We get into the flow. We get into how life meanders, up and down, back and forth and the more we get into the flow, the easier it becomes. I mean, rather than fighting against it, we actually work with it in order to get us to where we want to get to. And as we move past every increasing challenge, we too move upwards towards success. Constantly stretching. Constantly evolving. Whatever the definition of success means to you, and I want to emphasise that, each person has their own definition of success, but again we’re constantly moving towards that success, that level that we want to achieve.

But also on the Snakes And Ladders Life board game, there are the other players. They are the people that hold us back or are regularly negative around us. They bring us down. These are the people I refer to typically as the energy vampires. They pull our energy down. They suck literally every single ounce of energy out of us. They are the people that it’s not nice to be around, we don’t typically enjoy their company. They can also be the ones that we respect and because they tell us we shouldn’t do something, we take on board what they say because we respect them and therefore we don’t do these things that in our heart we would absolutely love to do. We end up not following our dreams. We end up not following our inner desire because we’ve taken on board the advice or the guidance of these people are again what I refer to as energy vampires.

And also want on the Snakes And Ladders Life board game, however, there’s also the helpers and these are the ones that support us and want to see the best of us and want the best for us and will support us in whatever way they can. And whatever we ask them, they are there to actually help us.

And some helpers may be there for a long time while other helpers may only be there for a very short period of time in our life. And sometimes we may not even recognise them as helpers, as at the times they may push our buttons or push our triggers. We may not like what they’re saying because they’re being challenging to us, but in fact, they’re actually there to stretch us and to help us to grow. And the one thing with the Snakes And Ladders Life is we don’t get to see the squares that are ahead of us. We just get to see the next square that we are to take. The next step, that one thing that we’re to do the next. We don’t get to see where all the snakes are on the board game, we don’t see where all the ladders are.

We move from one year to the next year. From one square to the next square. Literally the unknown future, we don’t perhaps know clearly where we’re heading. We have a sense, we have an idea of where perhaps where we’re heading, but we just don’t see all the steps laid out in front of us. But if we were to stand back from the board game of life and in your mind’s eye, you’re able to see the whole board laid out on the table in front of you. You could see everything that was going to happen, where all the snakes were and where all the ladders were.

You would know where you’re heading and what squares to avoid. You would see the whole thing, all the full picture in front of you, just as if you were playing the real game in real life as in the real board game. And as you play the game, the excitement lies in trying to avoid the snakes while trying desperately to get to the ladders so that you can win the game as quickly as possible. But in real life, if you had that knowledge, if you were able to see the full board game in front of you of what your life is to be like, where all the snakes are and where all the ladders are, you will do the same.

You would try and avoid all the snakes, you would just move as quickly as possible to the ladders. The thing is not knowing what’s ahead of us in life is part of the excitement. In the work that I do with my clients, I get to see the most amazing images of their purpose in life and where they’re supposed to end up. These pictures I get to see for my clients and the impact of what their life is going to be, these knowing is oftentimes absolutely breathtaking, it’s humbling, it’s absolutely exciting all at the exact same time.

But what I found over the years, rather than sharing the complete image with my clients, I need to break it down into smaller chunks, smaller pieces. If I shared a full picture of the image of what I get, they get scared or they say they don’t have the courage to do what I’m expressing from the image itself or how on earth they are going to achieve what I’m saying, I’m seeing in the image or in the knowing. Where for me what is overwhelming is the great way and the amazing what I see in where everything fits together and literally how this whole Universe works is just phenomenal. But for them it’s overwhelming and it’s a challenge.

So I’ve learned to give the picture piece by piece, much like the board game, square by square. That’s what life is like. For some, they can see it as being scary or unnerving, not knowing what lies ahead. For others, they see it as an adventure and they understand that as challenges appear or the snakes in terms of the board game as they appear, they view these challenges as a way of making them stronger in order to give them the tools that they actually need later in life in order to actually reach the level of success that you want or to reach their goal, to make the impact that they want to make, to fulfil their purpose in life. And I know this to be true.

I’ve learned that every challenge that shows up in our life is there for a reason, it’s there for a purpose. It’s like as if we go through life collecting all the tools we need in order to do the work we need to do in the future. I remember playing computer games when I was younger and in order to get to different levels in the game, you had to conquer different challenges. And each challenge was more difficult than the previous one. And as I went through the computer game, I had to collect different tokens or objects which were all to help me with the different challenges as I was going to face them throughout the different levels of the game and therefore would help me to reach to the higher level and ultimately win the game. And that’s what the Snakes And Ladders Life is like. It’s the adventure of meeting the challenges head-on and seeing them as something that are there to help us actually achieve greater things as opposed to being the obstacles that stop us.

The Snakes And Ladders Life board game as I’ve described, we can understand how it affects our state of being also, how we feel about ourselves mentally and physically. You see, each time we hit the ladder it means we move up to a higher stage of being as well, a higher state of consciousness, a higher state of knowing our true selves. Equally each time we hit a snake, we move down to a lower state of being. So, take, for example, an event that occurs in our life like our home has been threatened of repossession by the bank or we lose our job or we’ve been made redundant. This can cause us to drop to a lower state of being. This might happen over a long period of time or it can happen very, very quickly. That is what has happened in relation to the COVID- 19 scenario, whereby it happens so very, very fast in our lives.

While before we were in a higher state of being, we were focused on our ambitions and we were driven to go after what we want to. We can very quickly drop to a lower state of being, for example, we can drop to despair where we lose all purpose and all sense of meaning in life. And this can cause some of us to lower further that we’ll actually choose to look at a way of how we literally check out of the Snakes And Ladders Life permanently. You see, we move up and down these states all the time throughout our life. Some of us will be on the same state for many years. Others can move up and down different states through even the course of a day. Take for example, in a morning, you could have a business owner that might get confirmation of a brand new client that they’ve been looking to try and bring on board for quite a while and they’ve just been awarded a very large contract.

And as a result all of a sudden they’ve moved up to a higher state of being, a higher state of believing about themselves, about the business that they’re doing and what they’re doing in life. But then imagine in the afternoon that, that exact same business owner receives notice or a phone call or an email that they’ve just lost a major client. All of a sudden, the good thing that happened in the morning is overshadowed by this event and they drop to a lower state and a state of despair perhaps. You see we play the Snakes And Ladders Life game all the time. If you can imagine a heart rate monitor in the hospital where you see the line going across the screen and literally it goes up and down and it beeps occasionally, but then picture the different levels on the left vertical of the screen as being the different states that we all pass through while at the bottom horizontal of the screen is time.

The time can be measured in hours, in days, in weeks, in months or years. And as we go through life, that line, which is individual to each one of us moves up and down as we go through to different states. We go through life encountering these snakes and ladders and hence the reason we go up and down through these different states. And some snakes are small, others are large. Some ladders are small and some ladders are large. They’re the small wins and the big wins. But like before, if we were given the opportunity to stand back from the board game of life, we would see the board in its entirety. And as I said earlier on, we would actually be able to see where we finish. We would see all the snakes and we would see all the ladders.

But now imagine that there is another Snakes And Ladders board game to the right of yours and there’s one to the left of yours. In fact, if you were to look at it, there are similar board games surrounding all sides of your particular board game. And as you zoom out of your own board game and even further, there are more and more board games surrounding each of all the other players around you, each of all the other board games. So much so that if you allowed your mind’s eye to see it, you would see all the boards continued on all sides, far into the infinite, far beyond what you can actually see. And what you realise is that each person has their own Snakes And Ladders board game that they too are playing in life as well, their own Snakes And Ladders Life. And some of those people will move onto and through your own board just as much as you too will also move on to other people’s boards that are around you and back onto your own board game of life.

What you realise is that we’re all connected. Every single one of us, we’re all connected. That we all have this amazing and wonderful interplay with each other and as they go through life and they live and they play, they are all playing their own Snakes And Ladders Life game, just as much as you are as well. And that’s what we’re all working towards, moving towards, evolving towards, to this overarching one objective. Just imagine the amazement of the whole lot if you were to see it in its complete entirety because it is. You see life just like the Snakes And Ladders Life board game is supposed to be fun. Like the board game, it’s a game, it’s a fun game. It’s meant to be a fun game. It’s supposed to be a fun game. The more fun you have, the easier and the better it is to actually play at the Snakes And Ladders Life game.

So instead of chasing to get to reach the heights of our life and exiting at a 100, we should literally be having fun all along the way. And the more fun we have, then the more we actually obtain. That’s what the Snakes And Ladders Life is all about. So, consider where you are right now at the moment in your own Snakes And Ladders Life board game. Where does the next square lie for you? What does the next square hold for you? It’s about taking that next step. And just imagine what are the adventures that you’re going to have that are all ahead of you right now at the moment. And perhaps maybe it’s just time to roll that dice again and just see what that next square holds for you.

 

Check out The Executive Code Podcast for more on this topic.

 

 

 

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